Recurring Nightmares With My Invisible Monster | #ThoughtPost

Sunday, July 03, 2016
Ever wondered what kept you going? Despite all the shitty experiences you stand up to each day, yet somehow you still managed to continue and put on a smile. We tend to ignore what is troubling us. Sometimes it could be as simple as sleeping it off or as expensive as shopping therapy, binge drinking, and stress eating every now and then. As much as we love to, finding a solution is tough. So eventually, the only way most people do is to push aside those troubles, burying them deep down till your conscious mind no longer worry about them. Could it be that easy? No, my dear. That's just you being silly. Although it no longer affects you consciously, your subconscious mind still holds on to that memory; maybe with an even stronger effect.

It begins with a dream that eventually unfolds into a nightmare. First, you lose control of your body, similar to a lucid-like dream, where one is trapped in a dream against one's will. Forced in a setting that seems surreal to you, it felt like you're losing your mind. You can't leave. And you can't hide from what's coming. The anticipation was really what kills you. Because you knew, you knew exactly what's going to appear next; the monster you have been running away from ever since the nightmares started. This was the moment you start running, far away from it. You never get a chance to look at it, not even a glimpse. The monster remains invisible in your eyes, yet the presence of the monster and sound of its footsteps seems so close. So you kept running until you reached a dead end, the same moment you woke up before the monster could have the chance to get hold of you.

Every night, it always ends in the same way, a palpitating heart and a pair of watery eyes. You stay under the covers just like you always do, feeling safe, even for a little while. And how does it end? Calming your heart down and wishing the nightmares will never return, but they always do. You try so hard to brush aside about one thing but no matter how hard you try, it keeps coming back; each time stronger and longer. How much more can you take before you crumble? How long more must you face the invisible monster?

Till then.